Saturday, May 14, 2011

A Collage of Problems

So every once in a while I think to myself, you should do (insert task here).
And, like any well-meaning human being, I rub my hands together (with some spit to make me look awesome, of course) and embark on my epic journey of completing (insert task here).
Well, I find myself doing this more and more often as time goes on, which is really stupid because as the months pass I get farther and farther into the school year and, therefore, have more and more studying/homework to do. This in turn makes it even more and more impossible to finish whatever I've started.
Sound familiar?
I think everyone does this at some point, whether they will admit it or not. But, honestly, do other people - besides me - do this every day? Every week? I seem to have a million things to do ALL THE TIME and no time to do/complete them.
Not only do I have a crap-load of homework to finish EVERY DAY, but I also seem to have all these other things I have to do along with it. Mowing the lawn, pulling weeds, writing, practicing my instrument, helping with the school play, going joggin with my friends...The list goes on and on.
Yes, these may seem like frivolous things to worry about - like, "Wow, you have it SO hard, you poor thing" - but, honestly, if you think about how many hours there are in a day, and subtract from that the amount of time I'm in school, the number is pretty small afterwards. And it's not even just the lack of time in my days, it's the stress of it all as well.
And what makes it worse is that even with all this stuff I have to do, I still feel like I'm a failure of a human being. Aren't I supposed to be saving the world, or helping the homeless, or feeding the starving people of the world by now? Shouldn't I have accomplished something in these past 16 years? Something to make me feel accomplished or special or AWESOME?! I feel like I've wasted so much time just sitting around complaining (like now) and I should be out doing something with my life.

This is where I end up starting something and then never getting around to finish it. I'll start a recycling strike and go a little crazy about people throwing away paper or cans. This'll last maybe a week or so, and then I'll get busy and think to myself: let someone else do it, I'm too busy, I'll start again after I write this paper. BUT THEN I NEVER GET AROUND TO IT!!!
See my problem?
And it just gets worse and worse. I have a million little projects littering my bedroom to prove it. I have a wall half-covered in cut-outs from magazines - from when I wanted to make a collage. I've got nearly 20 stories started that I half-developed in my mind or on paper, and then just lost interest or forgot about them.

Anyways, I should probably stop ranting and go start my english paper, or maybe I'll start another story or something. :)
Hope to blog more often after this (but I wouldn't hold my breath...I might get too busy for blogging)

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